Drinking In the Presidential Debate
Posted on October 3, 2012 | By TheEnabler | 2 Comments
There is almost no earthly reason to watch a presidential debate. You might as well watch zumba ads, or clean your refrigerator coils (saving the earth one dust bunny at a time!). But here is one reason to watch- Presidential Debate Drinking Games – If you get hammered you might actually believe what they say!
September 28th – NATIONAL DRINK BEER DAY! (Seriously, what a great day)
Posted on September 28, 2012 | By TheEnabler | Comments Off on September 28th – NATIONAL DRINK BEER DAY! (Seriously, what a great day)
So, the headline pretty much says it all. It is National Drink Beer Day so you should drink some beer. I would suggest one of my new favorites, the Sierra Nevada Tumbler.
Tumbler is a nice, malty brown ale. I much prefer malty to hoppy in my beers. It is smooth, with a hint of chocolate. It is very nice for fall days. Unfortunately, here in the old Tumbler brewing grounds we are having a sudden surge of close to 100 degree days which detracts from this type of beer, even for me. But, in a week or two when we get some normal cool evenings, I am getting my Tumbler on! Going to take a tumble after drinking? Tumble stumble? I know there is an excellent phrase there, I am close, I can feel it.
Anyway, it is National Drink Beer Day and who are you to question the President? Get out there and drink beer and support the economy. Even Sarah Jessica Parker is!
Impending Doom! Baconocolypse is coming! (Also, how to make Bacon Bourbon)
Posted on September 27, 2012 | By TheEnabler | Comments Off on Impending Doom! Baconocolypse is coming! (Also, how to make Bacon Bourbon)
As reported all over, including here in the Examiner, an “unavoidable” worldwide bacon shortage is expected to hit worldwide in 2013. And if Dictionary.com is any guide, “unavoidable” means there is no way to avoid it. Needless to say, there is panic in the streets.
The shortage has barely been felt here in North America, where there remain adequate supplies with small spot shortages here and there. President Obama helped calm things also when, while attending a meet and greet ($75,000 for a martini) at Barbara Streisand’s house, he proclaimed that the United States government stands ready to release supplies from the National Strategic Pork Reserve to take care of the “legitimate bacon needs” of the 99%. He also floated the idea of seizing stockpiles of bacon and bacon related products from the “very rich” (defined as those having more than 10 lbs. of bacon assets). Warren Buffet immediately added that he eats much more bacon than his secretary and that is just not right.
Overseas, as seen in this picture, things are harder:

The tragic aftermath at a grocery store in Hong Kong that was reputed to have a supply of bacon (Lucky 7 Brand, supposedly).
What is causing this shortage? Global warming? Some experts are blaming the backlash against the backlash against the movie mocking Mohammed. These experts claim that Americans are deliberately overindulging in bacon to show their support for free speech and subtle atagonism against Muslim extremism. The real reason? Who is to know? All we know is that bacon is delicious and we may not have enough of it. Tragedy!
So, here is a recipe that can give you at least a bit of that delicious bacon flavor during the long dark night of the bacon shortage:
BACON INFUSED BOURBON
Take a fifth of bourbon (yes, yes, metric.). Here I would recommend a wheat bourbon which is generally sweeter and smoother than other bourbons. Maker’s Mark, the various Weller’s, Pappy Van Winkle (although why ruin that with bacon) or Rebel Yell (a perfect choice. This innocuous bourbon would do well with bacon and also is not that expensive). Fry 6-8 pieces of bacon and reserve 2-3 tablespoons of bacon fat. Put bacon strips and fat into a long, flat, covered container (a gallon ziploc bag, with the air taken out and placed in a baking dish works perfectly. Leave out at room temperature for 4-5 days (the alcohol preserves the meat). Remove bacon strips and enjoy them. Place the bag into the freezer for 30 minutes or whatever to make the fat solidify thus being easier to remove. Finally, strain the bourbon through a double thickness of cheesecloth or through a coffee filter to remove more of the fat and put back in bottle and enjoy.
(Enabler’s note: Bacon Bourbon is interesting and something to try out on your friends for novelty sake, but really is not that great IMHO. Try it yourself and make the call, though. As noted, it is worth doing once just for the novelty. For looks, you can leave a nice, crispy strip of bacon in the bottle, if the mouth is large enough).
Lokoween – Crazy, Caffeinated Halloween Commercialization.
Posted on September 20, 2012 | By TheEnabler | 2 Comments
Halloween has turned out to be the biggest adult party in a crazy sense holiday there is. New Year’s is close but is a bit more sedate and dignified. Unless you are Lindsay Lohan, but you are not (I don’t think she can read, especially since everything is blurry and spinning for her).
You are throwing a Halloween party and you want a theme, more than just dressing up. Pimp’s and Ho’s? Did that. Cowboys and OAP’s? (Oppressed Aboriginal People’s). That was fun until the loony lefties made you use authentically themed costumes for the women. That was not sexy. So you need a new theme. Thankfully, crass commercialization has given you one. LOKOWEEN!
So, you can go to Four Loko’s facebook page and get connected to the Lokoween theme and who knows, maybe they will sponsor your party. They also have some kind of scary Clownimorphify your Face software that they will be giving out soon, so look for that coming soon. Here is the scary clown thing’s image:
Anyway, there you have it. America at it’s finest. And the reason I post this is I delight in how pissed off the crappy liberal elites who know better than you what you should consume get-as detailed in an earlier post by my colleague The Bon Vivant. So, tell the Nanny State to kiss your Four Loko and get out of your face.
Important update: As noted in the comments by loyal reader Ashley, Four Loko no longer has caffeine in it. Voluntarily reformulated to help protect it from some of the witch hunts various states were undertaking (Full Disclosure: I live in California, the most screwed up state in the union, and they were banning Four Loko and “other” drinks that were premixed with alcohol and caffeine. Because no one would ever order a Red Bull and vodka because mixing is too hard.) So, thank you for that update, Ashley.
Back to School
Posted on September 1, 2012 | By TheEnabler | Comments Off on Back to School

So true in these litigious days. But maybe if you hit the bottle enough…..you could go hit a lawyer!
Jackpot!
Posted on July 6, 2012 | By The Bon-Vivant | Comments Off on Jackpot!
You’ve decided to do some home repairs, and as you’re rooting around in the attic, you stumble upon this…

Home Improvement
From ABC news, comes this heartwarming story.
To save money on the installation of central air-conditioning in his St. Joseph, Mo., home, Bryan Fite began replacing the wires in his attic, prying up the floor boards on the rafters. Along with possible savings, he found a treasure beneath the floorboards: 13 bottles of century-old whiskey.
[…]
All the whiskey in Fite’s attic was bottled in 1917 and distilled between 1912 and 1913. Fite, a self-proclaimed history buff, said the four bottles of Hellman’s Celebrated Old Crow whiskey he found may have been among the last of their kind. In 1918, the U.S. Supreme Court ruled in favor of Edson Bradley, the maker of the still-popular Old Crow whiskey bottled by the makers of Jim Beam, allowing him exclusive rights to the “Old Crow” label.
In addition to the Old Crow bottles, Fite’s attic was keeping cool a few bottles of Guckenheimer, the erstwhile Pennsylvania rye whiskey, and W. H. McBrayer’s Cedar Brook whiskey.
Thirteen unopened bottles of pre-Prohibition whiskey! Wowzas!
And what does, Mr. Fite plan to do with his treasure trove?
In 2017, when the bottles turn 100, Fite and his friends will pop them open, he said. But for now, they are simply antiques.
“Part of the allure for me is having them in their original state,” said Fite, who identified bourbon as his drink of choice. “I have high expectations of what they’ll taste like, and I’m afraid if I open them I’ll be disappointed.”
An admirable decision, sir. I salute you.
I would also name you an honorary Liquor Locusts, but the true Liquor Locusts would have had the first bottle already opened in the attic, and likely be through the rest in the next couple of months.
Strong Liquor
Posted on June 23, 2012 | By TheEnabler | Comments Off on Strong Liquor
There was an old sailor of Crete
Whose peg legs propelled him quite nete;
“Strong liquor,” he said,
“Never goes to my head,
And I know it can’t go to my fete.”
Rugbeer
Posted on June 13, 2012 | By The Bon-Vivant | Comments Off on Rugbeer
From Argentina comes the latest innovation in beer vending, Rugbeer. You have to tackle it, hard, to get the beer. But don’t worry, American consumers, thanks to our overlawyered, liability-mad culture, you’ll never have your manhood challenged by a novelty beer-vending machine.
Viva la fiesta, viva la noche, viva los DJ’s -News You Can Booze
Posted on May 10, 2012 | By TheEnabler | Comments Off on Viva la fiesta, viva la noche, viva los DJ’s -News You Can Booze
Yes, I know that has nothing to do with either Mexico or Tequila, but I like the song currently and it is all Spanishy, plus if you drink much Tequila you too will be Loca People (Johnny, la gente esta muy loca,wtf?).
Be that as it may, as my intermittent duty to enable, I like to post contests. This one hyar is for Don Julio Tequila. The wonderful folks at Don Julio have put together a contest that will allow 10 winners and their guests to get flown, first class the La Primavera Distillery in the “Los Altos” highlands region of Jalisco, Mexico. They also receive accommodations, a once-in-a-lifetime immersion in the art of tequila making, followed by two luxurious nights in Punta Mita, Mexico.
The lucky winners will be granted the rare opportunity to learn the intricacies of crafting Mexico’s number one ultra-premium luxury tequila upon visiting the La Primavera Distillery. Their tour will begin in the beautiful agave fields where our agave is grown by a careful artisanal method. They will watch an expert team of jimadors hand-select and expertly cut individual, fully mature agave, ripened for six to 10 years from the rich terracotta soil, for which the Highland region is renowned.
Following the tour of the agave fields, Tequila Don Julio Master Distiller Enrique de Colsa will guide the winners through the La Primavera Distillery where he oversees the small batch double-distillation process. De Colsa will provide insight on the rich brand legacy as well as provide an in-depth explanation of the details behind his six extraordinary ultra-premium tequilas. These are only a few of the amazing highlights from the tour, which will culminate in an authentic meal accompanied by traditional entertainment in Guadalajara.
To enter the contest you can “Like” them on Facebook (gawd I hate Facebook at times) or do some scan code thingamajigger at various retail displays. You can only enter once.
Anyway, the reason I post this is that I have a certain fondness for Don Julio,even though I do not really drink Tequila (more on that in another post). However, my favorite UPS Driver, Ooty, who would stop by with packages and sage advice was a strong proponent of Don Julio many years ago when he would lug it back from Mexico from visiting relatives down there. Now it is all over the place, but he was a strong proponent when very few of us Norte Round Eyes had ever heard of it.
So, enter the contest and hopefully win. You can also go here to Don Julio‘s site to learn more about Don Julio, the man, the myth, the headache generator.
Also, listen to the song:
P.S. And shop at this online jeans store.
Hear the Lamentation of The Women
Posted on March 17, 2012 | By The Bon-Vivant | Comments Off on Hear the Lamentation of The Women
Who says that Broadway is in decline?