Pergo® XP Extreme Performance Laminate (and Home Depot® Installation)-The Review (Spoiler alert-They suck)

I would suggest to you, that the following taken directly from Pergo is an incredible lie: PermaMax™ surface protection by Pergo features innovative ScratchGuard Advanced technology for double the wear, double the durability over ordinary laminate flooring. Authentic texture provides a realistic wood grain finish. Installation is easier and more secure than ever with the […]

Drinking In the Presidential Debate

There is almost no earthly reason to watch a presidential debate. You might as well watch zumba ads, or clean your refrigerator coils (saving the earth one dust bunny at a time!). But here is one reason to watch- Presidential Debate Drinking Games – If you get hammered you might actually believe what they say!

September 28th – NATIONAL DRINK BEER DAY! (Seriously, what a great day)

So, the headline pretty much says it all.  It is National Drink Beer Day so you should drink some beer.  I would suggest one of my new favorites, the Sierra Nevada Tumbler. Tumbler is a nice, malty brown ale. I much prefer malty to hoppy in my beers. It is smooth, with a hint of […]

Impending Doom! Baconocolypse is coming! (Also, how to make Bacon Bourbon)

As reported all over, including here in the Examiner, an “unavoidable” worldwide bacon shortage is expected to hit worldwide in 2013. And if is any guide, “unavoidable” means there is no way to avoid it. Needless to say, there is panic in the streets. The shortage has barely been felt here in North America, […]

Lokoween – Crazy, Caffeinated Halloween Commercialization.

Halloween has turned out to be the biggest adult party in a crazy sense holiday there is. New Year’s is close but is a bit more sedate and dignified. Unless you are Lindsay Lohan, but you are not (I don’t think she can read, especially since everything is blurry and spinning for her). You are […]

Back to School

Strong Liquor

There was an old sailor of Crete Whose peg legs propelled him quite nete; “Strong liquor,” he said, “Never goes to my head, And I know it can’t go to my fete.”

The one who knows, knows. El que sabe, sabe.

My current favorite foreign beer commercial. For Isenbeck beer. Clearly beer is a universal language. And a universal commercial.

Berkeley Skirt Lifter Cocktail

Well, Valentine’s Day has come and gone and with it the opportunities to melt your girl’s heart with small boxes of chocolate, flowers, and mushy cards with lace and hearts and such. Oh, you can still try those things, but in many cases it will simply make her think you are cheating on her. So, […]

Jenny McCarthy Teams up with CellarAngels to help destroy children’s lives.

Jenny McCarthy well known for posing in Playboy and launching a diabolical campaign to bring back childhood diseases by using her nudity-induced notoriety to stop childhood immunizations is not resting on her laurels. No, not satisfied with bringing back thousands of preventable childhood illnesses (visit Jenny McCarthy Body Count) Jenny McCarthy is teaming up with […]

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The Liquor Locusts

The Liquor Locusts

"The harsh, useful things of the world, from pulling teeth to digging potatoes, are best done by men who are as starkly sober as so many convicts in the death-house, but the lovely and useless things, the charming and exhilarating things, are best done by men with, as the phrase is, a few sheets in the wind." ~H.L. Mencken

The Dangers of Thirst

"Let your boat of life be light, packed with only what you need - a homely home and simple pleasures, one or two friends, worth the name, someone to love and someone to love you, a cat, a dog, and a pipe or two, enough to eat and enough to wear, and a little more than enough to drink; for thirst is a dangerous thing." ~Jerome K. Jerome

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The Jug of Empire!

The Jug of Empire!

"How solemn and beautiful is the thought that the earliest pioneer of civilization, the van-leader of civilization, is never the steamboat, never the railroad, never the newspaper, never the Sabbath-school, never the missionary -- but always whiskey!" ~Mark Twain