Posted on March 26, 2011 | By The Bon-Vivant | Comments Off on The Las Vegas Cocktail Waitress
Anyone who’s ever been to Las Vegas knows that the free drinks flow like alcoholic water, and that the young women delivering those free drinks are dressed in sexy costumes. And what’s not to like about that? You sit there playing your casino games while scantily clad, young women brings you free booze.
What you may not know, however, is that cocktail waitressing is a real job one with its own problems and demands.
Who knew? Most of us probably just thought that cocktail waitresses brought you that greyhound, or that gin and juice, because of your sparkling personality and striking good looks.
Allow me to put you straight by introducing you to Cocktail Dollie, the website of a real-life Las Vegas cocktail waitress. It’s a surprisingly entertaining read, one that will correct many misconceptions you may have about drinking for free in Las Vegas.
So what’s the story, are the drinks watered down or what?
No, at least not on purpose. If you mean, “Do you guys put water in the drinks to make them taste like shit?”, then the answer is a definite no. Why the hell would I purposely serve you a lousy drink for no reason, especially when I want a tip? Sometimes the bartender pre-ices the glasses so that when a waitress comes up to order, he’ll have them ready and it won’t take as long to make the drinks. This is time-efficient, but if the ice has melted, then the drinks will be watered down. I always make my bartenders re-ice my glasses if I see that this has happened, but some girls don’t care.
If you mean, “I can’t taste the alcohol,” then there are some very easy explanations for this. First of all, you get only one shot in a drink (unless it’s a Long Island or something where the drink itself is made with more alcohol). These shots are pre-measured because they are poured out of a “gun,” or else a bartender has to use a jigger if he’s pouring the alcohol from a bottle. Cameras are everywhere, and a bartender will not lose his job for you because you can’t taste the alcohol. For most people, one shot is sufficient. For others, who are used to free-pouring their own drinks at home and at parties, one shot is like a drop in the ocean, they can barely taste it at all. Also, the more you drink, the less you can taste the alcohol. When people start ordering double Jack and Cokes from me, sometimes I just bring them plain Cokes and they can’t even tell, and they continue ordering their virgin doubles, and they think I’m cool for “hooking them up.”
So, the answer is “no”, unless you a drunken asshole, in which case the answer may well be “yes”.
Of course, for the Las Vegas cocktail waitress, nothing is as important as the quality and quantity of your tips.
When we give good service and one customer stiffs and another tips, we are naturally going to return to the tipping customer, that’s just reality. Just like you go to work to make money, we go to work to make money too. And what would be the point of giving a stiff and a tipper equal service? When you tip, aren’t you saying, “Give me priority, give me the service I’m tipping you for.”? We are just trying to give the tippers their money’s worth! Of course it’s our job to serve everyone regardless of a tip, but for all the talk about how airheaded waitresses are, we know where our bread is buttered.
So, don’t be a stiff, leave a tip. It’s only a buck or two.
Of course, if you’d rather not, then stay at home, boot up your online casino, and open up that Costco-sized bottle of your favorite libation, ya cheap bastage.